Wolf-Girl

There you were

Like the light that weathered out the storm

Like the statue chiseled from the rockface

That I knelt to, praying for forgiveness.

But forgiveness never was your scene:

I always knew

That you weren’t the kind to go picking through the rubble.

You were the girl on the motorbike

With the petrol can empty in your hand,

Revving up for the perfect getaway

And smiling as you threw the match.

I was stained glass

Forever in pieces,

Held together by the lines

That traced stories in my fractures

And held out hope of something beautiful

If only I could let the light in.

But you shone so cold

Like a winter morning

That my colours froze over; all my lines meant nothing.

I scrabbled for words

Even as the glass shattered,

And I picked through the pieces,

Cutting myself up

To find a piece that still looked pretty,

To find something of myself

Worth making a gift of, something that would take

In the ice of your eyes that showed no pity,

In the chill of your heart where the wolf bones lay.

There you were

Sat beside me on the parkbench

With the wind in your hair,

Refusing to shiver

As I fought to strike a spark

From all of your silences,

To find the warming words

That would melt down your anger,

As you held yourself together,

Refusing to thaw.

The lump in my throat

Was where my love froze over:

I held my breath

To remember us swimming

In each other, drowning, the waves washing over,

But no waves would come now:

The tide had ebbed away.

You let me walk you home

Though the wolf in you was running,

And I squeezed what warmth I could

From these small mercies.

In the night when you came

To lay down beside me

You shivered at last,

And it was like a confession.

I struggled to warm you

With all that I had,

Every sliver of sunlight,

But you curled yourself up tight

And shrugged me away.

There you were

Turned out sharp the next morning,

Spinning ballerina round the subway poles

While I held on tight and wished for your grace

To keep me from falling,

To keep me from spinning out

Into the dark again,

Stretched out on the tracks,

Waiting for your light to come run me down

And run away laughing

With the wolf in your shadow.

I prayed for a flicker,

But there was only the match

That you struck on my soul

As our lips met at last.

You didn’t look back

As you threw it from the bus window

And it caught in my rubble;

You never look back.

The Journey Down Your Body

With the onset of evening

We threw our lot together

Like sailors just landed

Safe out of the storm.

With the door that closed behind us

We set our own horizons;

Our clothes slipped off like scales

With one kiss that tipped the balance.

This landscape of sheets

Where you lay yourself down

Arcs itself to your skin

Like it’s you it was missing;

Your scent nestles in

To the weave of the pillow

To tease me tomorrow

Long after you’re gone.

The journey down your body

Begins with this kiss:

Lips tugging like lovers

Swept up in a wave,

Keeping hold of each other

In the rush of the tide

And tumbled together

As they break on the shore.

The salt of your sweat

Like the waves that we swam through

Collects in the hollow

Where your neck meets your shoulder;

I linger there, lapping

At this warm salt stream,

But the pull of your pulse

Makes me want to dive deeper;

Like a sweet undertow

It carries me lower,

Sweeping down your skin

In a torrent of kisses

And surfacing suddenly

With salt on my tongue,

Cresting the wave

That hovers over your heart.

The journey down your body

Is a lesson in patience:

A time for all things

And all moves have their moments,

But all moments are one

When your heart strings together

Each beat of this dance

That keeps our worlds spinning.

You arch your back in waves

To the rhythm of my kisses,

Your chest’s rise and fall

Each yielding up treasures.

Your breath marks the point

Of each wave’s passing,

Gasping like a swimmer

Just breaking the surface.

And down again, gliding

Round each curve and hollow,

I follow the current

That shivers down your spine

Until it comes to rest

On my lips parted, open,

Pausing for breath

At the deepest part of you.

The journey down your body

Is a journey of inches:

Each inch is a tangle

Of spirit and skin

That I’ll tease with my fingers

But never unravel

While I’m working out my way

To work my way in.

I dive into you,

Eyes closed, fingers reaching,

Feeling my way

In this warm, soft darkness.

Your hands pull me down

‘Til I’m lost in you, drowning,

And every breath stolen

Is breathed back into you.

Each ripple of your body

Plays over my fingers,

Drawing me deeper

With each fluid moment,

And each secret place

Where I lavish my kisses

Opens out like a shell,

Its pink silk glistening.

The journey down your body

Draws me under the surface:

Each advance and retreat

Is a gambit of trust

Where the rules are unwritten,

And every new lesson

Erodes the division

Between reverence and lust.

Clinging to me like a swimmer

Half-settled on sinking,

You let the waves take you

And pull me down hard.

In the rush of the tide

We sink deep into each other,

Hearts beating together,

Lost in time, underwater...

…and out as the waves

Slowly slip away in whispers,

Leaving us stranded,

Our hands clasped together

Two shipwrecked survivors

Lying back in the breakers,

Worn smooth by the water

That tumbled us together.

The journey down your body

Etched itself into my compass,

Charting out oceans

For my dreaming mind to roam,

And when I venture back

From the journey down your body

Your smile tells me

I have found a home.